Celebrating Womanhood

Disclaimer : The events, characters and entities involved in this write-up are fictional. Any resemblance to any actual events or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.

I wake up, you too; I clean myself up and you do the same; we do the munching; come to office; work for 9 hours; have fun at work meeting people and attending to deliverables; come back home; enjoy rest of the day; have a satisfying dinner and doze-off ! Daily routine... encompassed in one line.

Do you see any difference? I don't. Do you think there's a difference? Me neither. Do you feel there is a difference? I do.

Gender equality is a rational phenomenon. Reality draws a different picture. We have overcome those days when females used to sit back and take care of family; or rather I should put it this way - they were 'supposed' to take care of family. Today, this situation has optimistically changed, however, not entirely. We still come across women finding it hard to live their dreams, do what they wish  to do. Shall we speak about 40 year-old Kanta bai who couldn't study much because her father couldn't afford?; or 35 year-old Sunita teacher who dreamt of pursuing higher studies before her parents got her married early? or 27 year-old Miss. Ankita who is juggling between decision-making phase of her life - career Vs. marriage? or 33 year-old Mrs. Shradha who has a perfect family but struggles to make a place for herself with her male counterparts at office? or 18 year-old Nikita who falls prey to drooling men everyday she walks out of her home? or 38 year-old Miss. Shikha who doesn't want to provide explanation to thousands of ears looking forward to hear why is she still unmarried? or 45 year-old super successful business woman Mrs. Neha, one of the executive heads at her company, who enjoys her lavish glass cabin which looks at the Mumbai sea-link but is unhappy by her husband's behavior towards her? or 60 year-old Mrs. Geeta who is fearful of her husband's bad temper even today when they have journeyed 50 odd years of their marriage?

Different lives, different stories, different reasons, different perceptions, different circumstances, one protagonist - a woman.

Recently we celebrated International Women's Day universally. Earlier I used to think why is there a need to celebrate a day like this?!? Why are there empowerment sessions for working women?!? The more I thought on this regard, the more I felt it pictures a woman in weaker domain, abala naari as she is profusely addressed. Deeper I dived into aspects, it was then that it dawned upon me - it is needed.  Not all are contented with the situations they are in. Being an Indian woman myself, I would like to exercise my right to free speech and say it outloud - it 'is' difficult to position yourself in a strong role and live freely in this still-male-dominated Indian society who sees women unequal to men. We have amazing hypocrites who love their mothers, daughters and sisters by their hearts and showcase maneuvering capabilities at promoting a deserving lady at their organization! I would like to pose a question to the readers. How many sentences/queries/articles/proverbs do you come across any time during your day which has inclusion of references to 'she' along with 'he'? For instance,  if you go to a customer service office of any service area and ask for examples for a certain case, you will always get to hear 'Madam, if 'he' is a customer then 'he' should do this xyz thing to get 'his' problem fixed. The simple point is, it should be 'he/she' while speaking referentially. We are so habituated to certain things that such occurrences hardly matter to us. Whereas, truth is, these unknown gestures (may or may not be meaningful) are a reflection of societal behavior. We call ourselves educated while majority of us are simply literates. There is a thin line between 'education' and 'literacy' which few of us realize.  

Though we have come out of ages where women found it challenging to get out of their houses, we still have families believing in old practices, especially for women. Orthodox thinking still prevails. Well, I'm now thinking of writing an exclusive article on the 'what-will-people-say' syndrome which is significant in our society and strangling it harder ! Why should a woman be scared of walking alone on the streets? Why should she be always shielded beneath thousands of layers of uncomfortable Indian wear, forcefully ? Why should she be thoughtful of her behavior towards strangers? Why should she be hidden, protected, guarded, ordered, forced by others? Just because she has a dysfunctional vagina !!

This article is nor anti-male neither demeaning men. Its purpose is yet another small attempt to make realize what is already known, written, voiced, explained, appealed and striding towards gaining strength. I have a wonderful father, super supportive brother ,senior male executives from my work life whom I admire deeply and a host of trustworthy male friends. But that doesn't make me fearless of getting into troubles when no one from these people is around me. All I have to follow is - be alert, be defensive, be courageous, believe in myself, say 'no' to what I feel I shouldn't go for, hold my head up high and greet the world with a sparkling smile - a smile which is unforgettable.

It feels great to see innumerable women personalities holding honorable positions. There have been success stories written about women, as men. Why? In order to spread the word that the fairer sex is equally capable of handling responsibilities and prove equally well in decision-making.    

I'm not here to change the world overnight. This is not a me-against-the-world story. It's just about logical thinking which is sadly very uncommon. Women are not weak, they do not need sympathy. All they need is respect. Not to look down, but to look upto. 

My physical strength may or may not succumb to unwelcomed forceful gestures. My mental strength may or may not hold me together to face inhuman deeds. I'll still be strong and never cease to aspire till I have the sky above and the road below me...!       

Embrace your womanhood. It's a gift.         

        

10:10:10

And it feels good to pen-down something after a hiatus J There are certain things in our lives which happen – sometimes uninvited, many a times as expected… good, bad, pleasant, unpleasant… most of the times – the indolent behavior… just like that! Introspection tells me I’ve been preoccupied with few things which refrained me from doing the scribbling… good enough to satisfy the rhetoric at this point in time coz this is gonna be a post after 12 months ! 

Well… Let’s move ahead with today’s piece of share. Few instances in the past have conglomerated and found their existences in the jugular vein - some personal experiences and some observations. This write-up is haven for all of them. Speaking to an old friend after a really long time (nostalgic), having aloo poha ^_^ (happiness), chit chatting at terrace(time-pass), reading a novel (bliss), playing cards even after losing several times (ultimate fun), dancing crazily (passion), sleeping for 12 hrs (divine), getting mad at someone without a reason and then saying – I was a total jerk ! (stupidity), having maggi at midnight (savior), driving late night just like that (feel-good), saying ‘Hi’ to a stranger just because you’re in a great mood (human), flirting with a friend and saying – nautanki sala ! (amusing), tasting wine for the first time and saying – yucks !!! (lol), sitting blankly, staring in zero ! (deep), going to a movie with great expectations and saying – GOD ! It sucked! (disappointment), listening to crap just because they’re your friends and you don’t wanna mess things up (friendship), talking to a distant relative after a long time … you can hear the pleasure over telecom (joy), walking alone : thinking (just-you time), staring at the blue water (thoughtful ), moist eyes on watching a sentimental scene of a movie (touching), the elegance of a classical dance performance (enjoyment), lying on the bed after a tiresome day (respite), talking to a school friend and asking – hey ! Do you remember me? (dangerous), gazing at the beautiful fireworks (lovely), expedition to a new place (sporty), having 7 types of deserts, feeling difficult to chose 1 ! (lucky confusion), staring at the dying mobile phone and saying – damn ! Couldn’t you live a bit longer?!? (annoyance), smiling on receiving a text message (delight), that day when you don’t want anyone to disturb you (selfy time), hitting ‘likes’ at FB (just-like-that), listening to ‘the’ A.R. Rehman songs (heaven), watching a flower blossom ! (eternal), sneezing 10 successive times (what the hell !), wishing for something and saying –‘ PLEASE – let this happen for me !’ (desire), witnessing stories which spread in I’m-telling-you-don’t-tell-this-to-anyone-else fashion (hilarious), collecting Rahul Dravid’s pictures being a child (admiration), riding your scooty at a great speed on a rainy day (crazy), A hot cup of coffee with your favorite novel (paradise !), watching elderly Amitabh Bacchan with tears rolling down your cheeks on his emotional dialogues (reverence), watching back-to-back episodes of a tv show (gladness) and many more instances like these add life to your years.

We get to enjoy life’s jiffies once; we might stumble upon multiple opportunities to do so; however, frequency varies from situation to person to companion to destiny. Good or bad, memories are the only ones which remain with us forever. One should have many of them. Start your collectables since life is a Pandora’s Box and you’re unaware of its beholdings.

Every cycle of 365/366 brings with it innumerable surprises which change the course of life for many. May 2014 be a splendid one for every heart breathing on this planet!

When your clock strikes 10:10:10, have a look at it replicate the emotion J

HNY folks !!!

Graffiti ...

And today when I logged-in to my FB account, my newsfeed was full of status updates/videos/thoughts shared across by many. Felt like hitting ‘LIKE’ for a few of them, didn’t feel like reciprocating many of them and when today’s updates ended, didn’t feel like signing-off before penning down this piece.

The entire Nation mourns the tragic end of a 23-year old; every news channel has the same cover story since the day this heinous incident took place and every newspaper is flooded with reports pertaining to questions on safety of the fairer sex across the length and breadth of our homeland. Youths are demonstrating their anger, senior citizens are condemning the happening, politicians are continuing with the blame-game, some are sharing their contemplation via social networking (me included) and all are eagerly waiting for justice to be bestowed upon. All fair!

Time for some retrospective thoughts:

Protestations at India Gate seeking address of President/PM/CM to the country are respectfully accepted. We, as a part of sovereign India, enjoy the right to expression. But, will Mr. Pranab Mukherjee or Mr. Manmohan Singh or Mrs. Sheila Dikshit stepping out of their offices and speaking to the agitated people of the country serve the purpose? My total agreement is with the notion of making law and order stronger and more vigilant which is the need of the hour, but will this be a solution to our concerns? History is the witness of innumerable cases still remaining opened. In some of them, the accused gets a bail; some cases plea for further proceedings to happen; some wait for justice and some cases die in the shackles of helplessness. The Pune gangrape (2010) victim’s husband is still hoping for justice to come his way. And these are cases which are fortunate to catch attention and rise up with the people fighting for righteousness. What about those which get hidden behind the home-doors (domestic assault)? What about those which take place in small villages incapable of reaching the ears of the city-air breathers? We live in a society where a political leader thinks that the reason behind increase in the rate of girl-malnutrition in his state is a self-restricted diet followed by the teenagers in view of enhancing their beauty! Damage to public property, assets and people can never pave the way to security. The armed personnels perform their duty in wake of National security following orders and midway if some unfortunate incident takes place and harm creeps in some or the other form, again the same game continues: public blame police, police blames public!

The root cause is lack of rational thinking. It’s the responsibility of EACH ONE OF US to take care that such incidences do not repeat. When a woman faces acts of disrespect in open-air, she expects the surrounding public to help her fight instead of being lip-sealed immovable objects possessing nasal pipes within their bodies! It’s not only about an Indian woman, similar cases thrive on US land; Japanese soil; African reach-outs. Hideous acts like these are being committed equally by educated people shutting doors to the conventional thought that persists. There is a huge difference between being literate and being educated! Up-brining matters the most. The man who treats his wife like a princess is a proof that he has been raised by a queen. Circumstantial differences occur in everybody’s lives but it should never interfere with one’s conscience.

Today’s protest, tomorrow’s death sentence, sighs-of-reliefs, case-closed!

Annus Mirabilis!!!

Life seems to get more beautiful as the days are passing (touchwood). Dunno why exactly. But it’s happening. Multiple reasons attached to the same string. One of the reasons may be the fact that it was this way right from the beginning...with me…I wasn’t able to figure out. And this is true for every human being breathing on this terrain. Opportunities, responsibilities, power, growth, trust, love, gain, happiness, friendship, betrayal, weird thoughts, apprehensiveness, aggression, passive gestures, hatred, motivation, inspiration, irony, sarcasm, hesitation…all are a part of our lives. Their frequencies vary from person to person. I may not have experienced all, but yes…most of them by this point in time. It has been a couple of months I’ve been going through a very good phase of life and maybe it’s the reason behind this inscription. Some things leave an impression on us, forever (This might raise ‘some brows’, especially people who know me… cz I’m worst at remembering things: P) Jokes apart, I can visualize a ‘Yes’ from every mind reading this piece. And such stuffs occupy the most vulnerable place within us. Raison d’être: it can keep on bugging whenever it wants to ;) and mostly, it’s the jugular vein. We all aim for a great life, which should undoubtedly be the aspiration. In this expedition, we come across myriad hurdles. The peaks and valleys which come midway have an implication, direct or indirect. Some can be stamped upon easily; some require perseverance, some perspiration, some call for additional helping force, some leave us mourning and some seem invincible, no matter how hard we try. The lone solution which works on these is – ‘our inner self’. We have got one life, which is gonna gradually rest to peace some day. Why not enjoy every moment, every thunder which comes our way? Earlier I used to ponder over petty things, sob over the superfluous, find myself in dilemma every now and then, take hours to conceal my ready-to-show-up thoughts. Well, it would be a lie if I say I’ve surmounted each one of them. However, I can undeniably say it right away that I’m in a better position now to deal with things which come my way. The road to perfection is always under construction and I’m still a traveller. In this excursion I’ve won many true bonds and added uncountable generous mortals to my acquaintances, irrespective of their attributes of existence. There are some really genuine people, interacting with whom feels like the number of RBC’s and WBC’s within our body have started to realize their true efficacy. It’s not difficult to find such individuals unless and until we try to have one within us. Complexity seems dear if we possess the courage to simplify it. We can’t change the world around us if the seed is not sown in our personal fields. I’ve learnt some esteemed lessons till date: a ‘NO’ with conviction is better than a flattered ‘YES’, laughing your heart out uncontrollably may send across barmy messages to the onlookers, however, it’s never gonna cause any kinda injury to their spines as long as you have a compelling rationale for yourself, friendship is the finest gift to mankind, speaking whatever is valid/true/just/appreciable should be put forth at the desired moment since opportunity knocks only once, never lose hope in self, listen to advices but follow your heart, welcome criticisms in your lives as if they are “kuch-toh-log-kahenge.com”, aiming at the sky by keeping your feet grounded is the key to success, humility is the strongest virtue, maintaining an arm’s length from pessimists is a way to preserve a healthy heart, ‘sorry’ and ‘thanks’ are the two words seizing the entire world’s strength when uttered, clear conscience is the softest pillow, being a part of the crowd is effortless and leading the same crowd provides you with an edge over many, avoid things which may cause regression in future, sometimes your goodness may be misunderstood but every dark cloud has a silver lining, being compassionate helps being yourself, change for the good and not against it, owning up our mistakes makes us even stronger by heart and mind, place the credits right, every nut has its bolt...each one of us has his/her own share of happiness..It’s just a matter of time. Existence of an egalitarian society is still a dream, unattainable. Approaching people, articulating our thoughts, extolling others, being juxtaposition with sudden temperaments assist a lot in developing self.

It’s not a philosophical book I’ve read from and pasted stuff here; it’s just the pouring-out of my mind’s graffiti. Trust me; it’s the best way of expression. When the pleasing breeze sways away... kissing the cheeks, the stimulant achieved is priceless!!! 2011 had been a year of mixed feelings. Hoping for a pleasant 2012 as well. Having the least idea about the coming 366 days of the calendar, I’m keeping my fingers crossed and wishing for the best to come.... thanks to all those who have been with me in my ‘thick and thin’. Statutory Warning : Stay right there, we have miles to swathe along :)

Happy New Year folks!!!

A windy tale

A serene feeling – which grips every heart, sometime, someday; the aura of which slides along the jugular vein; increasing the velocity of flowing emotions concentrated at a particular direction; due to which the whole world seems beautiful, is - the chimerical LOVE. No sarcasm, no irony. The following lines are all about a small statement. Read along to check it out.

You must have come across atleast one Affair D’amour in your life. One such story was with our Miss. Disappointed (Ms. D). Falling in love is easy, keeping it is all that matters. Ms. D, sitting near a window, in the memory of her beloved(who left her midway), wrote on a piece of paper that sentence which had changed her life then – “I LOVE YOU”. The memoirs flashed in front of her sobbing eyes like a camera roll, tears rolled down her cheeks, and eyes finally gave up blinking settling down calmly. Ms. D fell sound asleep. The air outside had some other purport that Saturday night. The wind came in like a careless whisper, took the parch of paper along with it, kissing Ms. D cold. This parch of paper flows across many lives. How it embraces different souls, follows next.

The paper reaches a children’s park and lands on a playing swing the following Sunday morning. A kid rests his hand on it and gazes at it. No idea as to what’s written, bothers least, his playful heart remains untouched by the most powerful emotion of this universe. Unknowingly, he tucks it in his pocket and forgets.

One – Done!

The paper finds itself in the hands, which have a daily feast with water and detergent. The maid at the boy’s place ignores it as something extremely unimportant coz it’s completely non-understandable to her. Quite fair. Throws it away in the dustbin.

Two – Shoo!

Next Monday morning, the paper struggled itself to get out of the garbage and the gentle wind takes it to its next destination – a construction site. The toiling hands didn’t notice this bit of paper.

Three – lee!


The breeze flew it by the roadside on Tuesday. A school-going girl(teenager) sees it. Picks it up, reads it. Gets lost in the memory of her classmate whom she had a crush on. But the pensive exam makes her rush towards the bus-stop while the paper slips from her hand in dismay.

Four – sore!

The winking Wednesday finds the parch of paper among the creative people. A dance teacher, while coming to her class happens to put a glance over this paper. The written matter instigates a beautiful story in her mind. The mudras in combination with abhinaya put up a great show for her.

Five – Life!


The clever wind took the paper down the streets on the thundering Thursday. A lovely couple finds it nearby, however, it doesn’t get any attention as the two souls were already experiencing the magic of it.

Six – Fix!

The un-futuristic paper then reaches a table by which a beautiful girl was sitting deep in her thoughts. Her lonely heart had no effect of the three mesmerising words.

Seven – Raven!

The freaking Friday found its solitaire with a 75 year old heart along with the paper by a shore side. The old man, who was thinking of his better-half, was cajoled to rewind his happier times. He was wondering why she left him alone in this world 50 years back. Flashes of his entire life came in front of his eyes. Wished if she were alive. The settling sun indicated his leaving time. Giving his weak bones enough strength to carry his soul to the destination house, he grabbed the stick and strolled away, leaving the bit of paper aside.

Passing through so many genre of people, touching many hearts, alike, the small bit of paper with three whimsical words “I LOVE YOU” was lying beside the shore exactly one week later, same day. After some time, the note slipped into water...got wet.....
Love is everywhere. The essence is felt every moment. Just it needs is – a pure heart to feel it and a pure mind to spread it.

The Inexplicable

Sitting calmly; before sleep; thinking about self, people around who matter in life, things which add meaning to my existence ...etc,etc. Feels good to be back. It’s been long since I held a pen and paper to express my thoughts. A feeling of deja vu creeps in at this moment. Such an abstraction of human mind creates a sense of belongingness to everything. Strange, but true!
Life has changed a lot. There was a time when I didn’t feel the need to explain myself to people. Everything used to be self-explanatory. There used to be a plain talk, that talk used to go manifolds and end up with a feel-good factor having a hidden message saying – Enjoy this moment, it won’t return. This is it! At that point in time, never gave a thought about how would life be after this, without such things, people, situations. May be, never felt the need to.
And now I am. Altogether in a different environment. New people, surroundings, way of reciprocating. World is very different. Coming out of one’s shell makes the person realize the reality. The outside world is not as I perceived it to be. Reason may be hidden in the fact that I was never exposed to it earlier. People are different, the way each person thinks is different. It becomes difficult to make a consensus. Showing dislikeness is acceptable. Every individual has the right to expression. If it tends to create rift among people, it’s better to keep it to self. This applies to certain situations as well wherein clearing out matters is not possible. And where there is a hope of doing so, people take it otherwise. Also, there is no dearth of “Doubting Thomas’s” around, either.
That was all about natural behaviour of people which is invincible.
Next comes self analysis.
Change of state of mind has become frequent these days. Thinking about a thing links to another one which sometimes brings a curve across my face. It makes me feel good walking down the memory lane. It even happened once when I was supposed to call someone and after placing the call I suddenly realized that it was a wrong dial. Happens. It’s also difficult to make people understand what you think. If it’s not properly conveyed, the whole thing gets messy. People who are sycophant are a challenge to handle. I simply hate those who don’t even care if a known person is passing by(it’s taken if you haven’t noticed the person). An acknowledgement always makes you aware of the fact that a certain person is connected to you in some way. Body-language plays a key role in passing the right message. No offence to people who don’t agree with the above.
Now comes the generalisation of the whole story.
A man is all alone. Friends, acquaintances, business-connections are attributes which/who help us lead our lives in a simpler way. Of course, priorities differ and they should, in fact. Facing the obstacles boldly and finding a solution is the real test. Expect little, give much. Care a damn about the person who feels the same for you(there is hardly anyone if you are genuine ;) conditions apply...). Try to avoid negative thoughts, people. Feel the dextrous. Think rational, be real. That’s the key. I’m still trying to explore the mystries of the world. I’m glad that I’ve come across some good souls in this expedition. Meeting them, adds flavour to life. This journey is becoming interesting day-by-day. Hope it continues likewise. Feel free to share and add more if you’ve experienced such things in your lives too. Now, it feels great being myself. Back in ation. Watch out this space for more!!! Till then, keep smiling.

Utopia 1

As I sit down to write this piece, there’s a mesmerizing scene outside – I’m witnessing a heavy downpour!! After a break of one whole week, again the mighty blow of monsoon. Feels great!! But it makes me think of the fact that it’s June end. There are myriad examples from our day-to-day lives which, I believe, are of utmost importance and need to be taken care of but unfortunately are left behind. We all imagine of a world which would get better as days pass, a world free from sins and atrocities. If you don’t imagine likewise, I appreciate you for being realistic but pity you for not being rational. So now, there are two things you can do: either skip reading further coz we’ll be going through a journey involving small things which make huge differences (not for REALS) or, go through it and decide for yourself.
Some instances of our lives follow which I really can’t understand why can’t they be the other way round…
1. We see many kids playing around our homes, in apartment lobbies, playgrounds etc. (especially outdoor activities considered). They enjoy playing & are engrossed in themselves. When they play on streets ,where there are more chances of hindrances, if by any way their playing gets disturbed, just lend an ear to their conversation. It’s a perfect blend of arrogance, disobedience, anger, attitude and vigilance. All we can do is – ignore!! (bachche hai..) I agree that not all fit into this bracket but what about those who fit in? This definitely is not a good behavior to carry f/w. Who’s to be blamed?? Dunno?!?!? Let there be peace…….
2. A pure & subtle relationship – between parents & children. No need to discuss about its purity but due to some wild reasons, has become messy. Peer pressure & mishandled children. Why can’t parents understand what their child needs & why can’t the children make their parents proud by enjoying the just?? Let there be peace……….
3. Well, this point of mine is not at all an objection but a wonderment at how some things and people can make one go crazy… I’m talking about the Bollywood actress – Katrina Kaif. She can’t read, write and speak Hindi still she is a superstar with her fan list increasing infinitely so also is her charge per movie ;-) Oh, come on!! It’s a big game misunderstood by many. Let there be peace…….
4. The least bothered but the most important part of our homes – the dustbin, is not made the right use of at many places. If u reside in a flat, it’s not a regular sight. But for those who have independent establishments would have come across a problem – garbage getting collected near the entrance gate. I can’t make out why people don’t think of the right ways! Morally, to keep the surroundings clean one should collect the garbage & put in the dustbin. Many people have the good habit of collecting the garbage from their area but the worst habit of dumping it at the boundary line of their neighbors!! Ridiculous!! I guess none of the 206 bones gets affected if the garbage is properly dumped in the respective dustbins. Let there be peace………
5. When a person does something wrong & anyone witnesses the wrong doing, the accused is in a state of guilt. The lone feeling of committing a sin is enough for the accused to confess. But some blatant creatures are there on this planet who are unbelievable! I’m talking about Ajmal Kasab. I wonder, at such an age how can a person unite all his energies to work against humanity! Circumstances make one lame but there’s always a way out. This also makes me think of all those who destroy mankind for other men. Absolute pity for the brains which can work wonders. Let there be peace………
6. Another small happening, least bothered – our street-lights working in the daylight & remaining blind during nights!! I was listening to a Radio Station at which the RJ was discussing the same problem & he was out with a suggestion. The Corporation authorities can provide switches at suitable places for the street-lights. We have so many old people coming out of their homes for morning &evening walks. Why can’t they be given the responsibility of operating the switches to avoid wastage of valuable energy? After all , they are the most reliable and responsible!! This implementation will take ages to digest. Lack of faith, I guess. Huh…….Let there be peace………..
7. Recent happenings in towns & cities found a place as my seventh point – Honour Killings! I feel ashamed of such people. What type of pleasure are they seeking for their families by killing those whom they loved their entire lives?!?!? Clueless about the mentality of gentlemen and ladies!! Truly….Let there be peace……….

There are a lot many situations in our living scenarios which make us think opposite. This is gonna become lengthier so I’ll put them in parts. When I’ll get another set of seven, it’ll be UTOPIA 2. An appeal – think of the right way, follow the just. Till then………..Let there be peace!!